The Flerp-a-Jerperis Trading Card

The Flerp-a-Jerperis

The Flerp-a-Jerperis

The Flerp-a-Jerperis is indistinguishable from an enraged Tyrannasaurus Rex when strawberry jelly is involved. Once a Flerp-a-Jerperis sees the jelly jar, it will not cease roaring until it has some strawberry jelly in its tiny hands.

The feeding frenzy that follows usually results in a few square meters getting coated in sticky red filth, and that is if you have the beast restrained securely in its feeding station. Feeding a Flerp-a-Jerperis while it is allowed to wander freely will result in sticky grossness spread throughout any dwelling no matter how large.

Fun Fact:

Humans who have brought a Flerp-a-Jerpis into their homes have marveled at the creature’s ability to keep each and every doorknob in a state of perpetual stickiness.


Flerp-a-Jerperis prefer to be inside any cabinets or closets or rooms that you would prefer they stay out of. Make sure ketchup and strawberry jelly are the most dangerous things they can get to.

More Improbable Creatures:

This trading card is part of a series titled “Uncle Joe’s Field Guide to Improbable Creatures” by Jethro Sleestak. View more Improbable Creatures.