Fact Check: Not Even Satan’s Emissary Varlax the Impure Can Stand Mike Pence.
Consider this quote from Varlax’s most recent appearance on Fox and Friends:
“I mean, hear me out. I’ve had to listen to Stalin, Hitler, and more psycho serial killers than I can shake a stick at, but this guy is too much. All that phony godliness, and he’ll still tell any lie they give him, doesn’t matter how bald face it is. Say fucking anything. Makes me wanna puke.”
Varlax the Impure, Satanic Emissary to the Trump Campaign
MOST YEARS YOU ONLY GET TO CELEBRATE 420. THIS YEAR IT’S 2420.
How odd is it that the people who like to think of themselves as patriotic or religious are violating quarantine lockdown orders without regard to the public good or the lives of the old and infirm?
How odd is it that ordinary deadbeat stoners staying home and getting high are contributing more to public safety than all these other idiots?
For years I knew April 2020 was going to be wild and crazy, but this shit is fucked up in ways I could have never imagined:
A reality-TV star President with dementia attacking reporters and boasting about what a good job he is doing in what is supposed to be a daily briefing about an unprecedented worldwide crisis.
A man who cannot open his mouth without lying or boasting or name calling or sounding like a spoiled vindictive child. Endless petty squabbles. Endlessly describing people as geniuses and then idiots when they disagree with him.
And to top it off: There are still stupid motherfuckers out there saying he is doing a good job.